fuckyeahasexual: absentconspiracy: ...

fuckyeahasexual:

absentconspiracy:
fuckyeahasexual:
daffydithcourthe:
slavz:
regphobic-giratina:
If your aroness or aceness stems from dysphoria, you’re a valid aro or ace.
If your aroness or aceness stems from past trauma, you’re a valid aro or ace.
If your aroness or aceness is an integral part of who you are as a person, you’re a valid aro or ace.
If you have no idea what your aroness or aceness comes from, you’re a valid aro or ace.
I’m sorry I don’t make the rules.
my “aro/aceness” did come from trauma and dysphoria and this mindset is what kept me from getting better and pursuing healthy relationships because i was told everything was perfectly fine with me and getting help was aphobic. then i did actually get help and listen to my therapist and low and behold that “aro/aceness” was a symptom not an orientation and, after getting better, straight up vanished.
if you think you’re aro, ace, or both because of factors like trauma and dysphoria, go get some help or at least try to heal before deciding to use the labels. and if you don’t know where it comes from, think about that.
no one becomes gay due to trauma or dysphoria, that doesn’t actually happen. if you think your orientation comes from those things, you need to reevaluate some stuff and get help. chances are if you actually are aro or ace, it had nothing to do with trauma or dysphoria. correlation is not causation and if your ace or aroness is caused by those factors, you need to get help. and, hey, if you’re still ace or aro after getting help, cool, that happens, but your personal issues would have nothing to do with that. if you’re like me and many others, however, and you realize you aren’t aro or ace, you were never either of those things to begin with and you were holding on to pain.
That’s not an appropriate rhetoric.
Neurodivergence isn’t some monster that represents all thats wrong and disgusting with humankind. It’s a word that describes what people are.
The a-spectrum has always had a close relationship with neurodiversity. And thats precisely because of people who discover their asexuality/aromanticism through exploration of their neurodivergence.
And you’re wrong - people actually do ‘become’ trans and non-straight due to trauma and neurodivergence. That’s a thing that happens. And we can frown all day and question their legitimacy, but that’s such a non-issue.
People question and re-question their sexuality all the time. Ace/aro people in particular are under extremely strict scrutiny. There’s many reasons why someone would drop their a-spec label, or perhaps pick up a slightly different one, and so on. You attributed it to forsaking your trauma. That’s your story. And yours alone.
Queer identities are spawned by neurodiversity all the time. It doesn’t suddenly become suspect because it’s ace/aro people in the picture.
- Fae
Alikening and attributing LGBT identities and ace identities to mental illness is toxic you dumb fuck
No. Listen.
LGBTQ people are more likely to be neurodiverent most commonly from the anxiety and stress they are under. Anxiety and stress changes the way you react in situations. If trauma happens and changed your world view all we are saying is that’s okay. Maybe it will change when you heal, maybe it won’t. I personally hate the idea that you are the person you were before however. Doesn’t seem to be true. You can be strong or even stronger than you were before that. Still have you’re core self, but still different. Mental health should come from a “what would you like” perspective not a “how do we make you more normal” perspective. Do get help, don’t try to deny your current feelings in the process. If you do, how are you meant to be honest while getting that help in the first place? - Rose